Baby

               The greatest joy is to be with a baby who is trying to learn new things. In the presence of a baby child all feel at ease and at home. The baby doesn’t pretend, but is quite natural. We very well know the characteristics of a baby; however the life of a baby which is to come into the world is at stake because according to the current times the mother will be the one to decide whether to stay pregnant and have a child or not to do so. Actually, I feel that because of this authority or power given to the mother, the value of/ for life will perhaps decrease.

                For whatever reasons, good or bad due to which the woman gets pregnant, I think the baby too must have a say like the mother who has been given the power to decide about having the baby or vice versa. I imagine the baby, seconds before the operation asking, pleading and begging the mother for one chance to live. Does the fetus/ baby/ child have no say in the matter of its own life?

                According to Christianity or let me put it this way; from the knowledge that I have about conception and that life is sacred. Since life is sacred, no one has the authority or power to take it away or destroy it. I agree that an unwanted pregnancy is a cause of mental, interpersonal and many other types of stress to the woman but what is in her womb is a creation of God. By aborting the child or taking any other measures that are unfavorable to or hamper the baby’s/ fetus growth is something against creation.

                The woman has a tremendous role in the society and she has the power to decide. This power must be used to decide when the favorable time to conceive is. Life is a fragile gift which needs tender hands, mature brains and a loving heart to survive.

Live and let live!

Take some time

Take some time to relax,

Take some time to sit and see,

Take some time to enjoy,

Take some time cause its God’s free gift.

Take some time to sit near a tree,

Take some time to see it grow,

Take some time to love and caress it,

Take some time cause its God’s free gift.

Take some time to sit with friends,

Take some time to know them,

Take some time to empathize with them,

Take some time cause its God’s free gift.

Take some time to sit with a dog/ cat or any animal,

Take some time to appreciate and encourage it,

Take some time to love it,

Take some time cause its God’s free gift.

The poor need you

In our Indian we notice a big contrast where the rich person has not only things which s/he needs and desires but also things that are not needed. On the other hand the poor lack or in some cases and situations are deprived of their basic needs. To put it in the words of the German philosopher Karl Marx, it’s like a situation where there are the ‘haves’ on one hand and the ‘have nots’ on the other. It is a social struggle where the ‘have nots’ want to rise up socially, economically and politically.

Poor people are those who struggle to meet their basic requirements in order to survive. Poor people are often prone to injustice, inequality, illegal activities and even disease. It is truly a noble act to help the poor with food, clothing and sometimes finance, but it is even greater to help them help themselves. It is said that it is better to teach a poor person how to fish rather than giving that person a fish. Teaching people to work hard and earn their living gives them a sense of self-worth and dignity, while on the other hand doing charity to them only makes them more dependent and at times even lazy.

According to me the best way to help the poor taking into account all the dimensions of life is to be with them. Being with them in some way or the other will open our eyes to reality and also enable us to help them help themselves. After knowing their situation one may even be driven to make appeals or do fund raising on social media or if not atleast make some sacrifices so as to do charity. Donating things that are not really necessary for oneself can also be another way of reaching out to the poor and the needy.

The main problem of the poor is that they do not have sufficient money which leads to other problems like lack of food, clothing, shelter and so on. The root of all these problems is that they are uneducated. A very apt solution to meet the needs of the poor which is very suitable for our country is ‘Each one teach one’, by doing this knowledge will be passed on and the condition of the poor will begin to change. For this to take place a whole change has to take place in our attitude and outlook.

Stephen Covey says: “Find your voice and inspire others to find theirs.” What I understand from this is that we who have a decent life with all the needed necessities have a duty towards our less fortunate brethren. Am I responsible for my brother/ sister (poor)? Yes I surely am, by the bond of humanity. Let’s serve God by serving our friends in need.

Aditya

                 I am with mixed feelings now as I’m somewhat close to the post- climax story of a couple portrayed in a novel. It is rightly said that love is not only a bed of roses but also of thorns. I am dumbstruck at the thought that a relationship which sailed smoothly for a year or so came crashing down after some miscommunication took place. When I reflect back on the story, I blame both the characters namely Aditya and Riya for having taken foolish decisions and indulging in too much of needless thought processes.

                On the one hand Aditya committed a grave mistake by not clearly putting all his cards on the table before Riya. While on the other hand Riya became extra sensitive and eventually became like a slave unto Amit (Neha’s boyfriend). Aditya rightly describes the 4 day stay at Ratnagiri as the worst days of his life (due to which his relationship took a turn for worse). The worst situation to face in life is when your own friend takes away your girlfriend. This happened with Aditya. However as all good things come to an end, likewise happened with Aditya and Riya. One year had passed from the time they broke up. Riya was working in a call center at Malad. One day she sent a message to Aditya thinking that he was Mr. Banerjee who was looking out for a job. The message exchanging took place and both of them realized that they couldn’t live without each other and hence they reunited.

                ‘Love can never be wrong but a girl can be’. In this case both and the girl were right. Kudos to Sudeep Nagarkar for having written such a heart touching story.

Mother

‘Mother of mine, you gave to me……… Mother Sweet mother of mine.’

Leaving perverts and those who are psychologically unstable, all of us love and want to be with our mothers. We want to be with them because we feel a sense of oneness with them. They have borne us in their womb for 9 months, not only this, they have undergone tremendous experiences of pain and sacrifice to see us grow.

                It is said that opposites attract, however this application can be kept aside when it comes to mothers. Our mothers love us without taking into consideration our maleness or femaleness. Their love for us is beyond compare. A mother is ready to do anything and willing to go to any extent to see her child happy.

                However while there are genuinely good mothers who care for their children, there are also mothers who absolutely don’t care for their children. We hear of cases where mothers have left their children in a bus / train, on a railway station and so on. Sometimes it is heartbreaking to see children who are removed from a dustbin or a wastepit. Some might condemn these mothers for doing such a heartless thing but we need to remember Jesus’ words ‘Judge not and you will not be judged’ and also Pope Francis’ words ‘Who am I to judge?’

                In the court of law, all sides are given due consideration and after putting all the broken pieces together, the judgment is passed. I suppose that judgment in Gods reign is also somewhat similar to this. When it comes to mothers they are usually less judgmental and more loving. Mother Mary can be called ‘The Mother of all mothers’. She bore the Son of God in her womb and suffered with Him from the time He was born unto His death.

                Today she intercedes for us, pleads for us to God and lifts us when we fall. She is like a connection between Jesus and us. She, being a loving mother is always willing to intercede for us. 

Death

Death comes all of a sudden, without any warning or prior notice. It leaves nothing and no one. Death is a bitter truth that all of us have to accept at the close of our lives. Some meet death in normal circumstances while others meet death in tragic incidents like an accident, a heart attack and so on.

After categorizing death, let us move on to the acceptance and the non- acceptance of death. This applies to the family and the friends of the person who has pa

ssed away. Sometimes it comes very difficult for some people to accept the death of a dear one; we see how a parent acts like a small child at the death of his/ her own child. Once when I was about 18 years of age, I saw that the mother was willing to go in the grave with her son.

This incident of death taught me an important lesson about love. The lesson that I learnt is stated in one of the hymns we sing ‘Love is stronger than death, stronger even than hell’. Nothing has ever been or will be produced that can destroy the power of love. Love is such a powerful uniting force that it refuses to leave the bond even after death.

All want to prolong their life, no one wants to die, however the matter of fact is that life and death are given to us as a coin. We also have the choice of choosing life/ death by the choices we make, lines of action we implement and so on. Life is a God given gift which is placed at our disposal for good use.

Life is God’s gift to us, what we make of it is our gift to God.

Life

Living life with purpose, meaning, enthusiasm and passion is the dream of everyone. I must attest that it isn’t very easy nor is it too difficult to live a meaningful life. A life based on Values is 100 times better than a life that is focused on the theory of the ideals that are difficult to reach. Ralph Waldo Emerson says, “Who are you speaks so loudly I can’t hear what you’re saying.” Children can learn respect for elders by looking at their parents and can also learn to tell lies when their parents tell them to tell the caller that they aren’t there at home.

When it comes to following values in life, there are no two ways about it. Either one lives a value based life or one doesn’t. Values are something that makes us say ‘Yes’ to somethings and ‘No’ to others. It’s basically something that we are convinced about and are willing to sacrifice our lives for. Hence I believe that if there is something that I place my hard-core belief in, it must be worth it or my life is at stake.

People living Purpose driven lives are much more effective than those who live without any specific purpose. The main difference to notice is that those whose lives are driven by purpose have their energies focused on what they want to do and achieve. Energy when focused has much more power than energy which is not focused. A picturistic example that comes to my mind is that of the magnifying glass which when held at a proper angle has the power to produce fire by channelizing the sunrays.

Viktor Frankl in his book ‘Man’s search for meaning’ writes: “He who has a ‘why’ for which to live, can cope with any ‘how’.” When one finds something in life that one can live for, all the forces within that person come alive to meet this purpose. Rick Warren in his book ‘Purpose Driven Life’ clearly pens down the purpose of life, he writes: “Life is a preparation for eternity. We were made to last forever, and God wants us to be with Him in Heaven.”

Lastly, talking about a life lived with Passion; it is good to be aware that zeal and passion are things that are within us. When one has a clear cut purpose for which to dedicate one’s own life, passion flows automatically to supplement the purpose or meaning filled life. John Mason says: “It is one thing to be living; it is another to be alive. Living alive is living with a lusty thirst and passion for life.” Living fully is a sign of gratitude to God who has given the gift of life.

The book of Ecclesiastes gives a simple formula: “Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might.” Let’s live a VPP life

1.      Value based life

2.      Purpose driven life

3.      Passionate life

Exams preponed

I’m very sure that you would be horrified if the timetable of your exam were to be changed in the last days (few days before the exam). You might also curse the educational department for doing so because you have begun preparing for it at the last moment. You may have set your mind towards these last days of sincere last minute study, but it all goes to waste because of this change in the timetable.

This is what more or less took place in my dream last night, I was at my desk studying the subject with all my heart, soul and mind. I was all the more serious since a lot of my study time in the days past was taken up by some activity or the other. I had full concentration on what I was doing. On the outside I looked focused but on the inside I was quite anxious. After some time the bell rang and it was time for lunch. With a heavy mind I started trudging the path towards the refectory. I was trying to relax myself by looking at the plants, the trees and the birds within our camps.

As I was walking, my eyes fell on the notice board where the timetable of our exams were put, the timetable which had come out some days earlier was place at the left side on the notice board and to my horror, in the centre was a paper with title ‘Change in timetable for B.A. exams.’ I was petrified by this and rubbed my eyes to clear my eyes. The paper was there; I became tensed as I resumed walking. Change in the timetable meant that I would have to re-schedule everything that I planned.

The dream ended here and I got up to the reality of our current times. The important lesson that I draw up from this dream is that:

Last minute preparation is not always the best thing to do/ rely on.

Haste makes waste.

Time and tide wait for none.

Praying saints

WE NEED SAINTS WHO TAKE TIME OUT TO PRAY

‘A prayer in its simplest definition is merely a wish turned heavenward’ – Phillips Brooks

It is amazing to note that we human beings turn upward when thinking or relating to God. We look up to God to fulfill our aspirations, desires, needs and things of the like. However when we are met with unforeseen situations which lead us to a negative end, we look up to Go to complain or at least to ask ‘Why’. We turn to God because we know that He will listen to us despite our shortcomings. When we pray, we place into God’s hands all that is in our mind and heart.

            Prayer according to me is like a dialogue between a father and his child. The child is happy to share experiences with the father and the father too on the other hand is glad to hear his child speak to him. Prayer happens spontaneously like dialogue. The child isn’t told to dialogue with the father but does so spontaneously. In the same way we human beings who are not only material beings but also spiritual beings spontaneously relate to God. ‘Prayer is the voice of faith’ – Horne.

            The famous proverb ‘Where there is a will, there is a way’ can be applied to prayer. If a person wants to pray, no one can stop that person. That person will breakthrough all the barriers and hurdles so as to meet God in prayer. That person who gives so much importance to prayer has realized a very important thing i.e. Prayer is a power or a force which keeps human beings going. Prayer maybe termed as the SIM CARD without which the mobile cannot connect to others and God.

            ‘Our prayer is public and for all, and when we pray, we pray not for a single person, but for the whole people, because we are all one’ – St. Cyprian.

When we pray to God, usually we pray in a group because we feel bonded and pray not only for individuals but for all people. A very important lesson I’ve learnt about prayer is that it changes me and helps me to adapt to situations; and not vice versa.

Education

‘THE WHOLE PURPOSE OF EDUCATION IS TO TURN MIRRORS INTO WINDOWS’

Education has and will continue influencing the lives of human beings. There have been many educated scholars in the past who still continue to impress us by what they said or did. Not only that, there are also the so called ‘not qualified’ who have achieved splendid breakthroughs both in our current times and in the times past. Some of them are Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates and Sachin Tendulkar.

            On a personal level, the term ‘Education’ brings the picturesque image of a banyan tree where education in the olden days used to take place. Even now, I feel that, that method of education should be implemented because according to my experience we learn more by observing and doing things by ourselves rather than by following a strict syllabus and giving loads of exams. The only thing that matters here is the amount of degrees or certificates one has to ones name. Sometimes this struggle for a degree ends up with the student being frustrated which eventually leads to suicide.

In his book Emile (1762) Rousseau says that children are naturally good. During their earlier years they should be trained in the class of nature and be kept away from the stifling influence of books. What he means to say is that education is basically a matter of the heart more than the mind. To add to what he says, I feel that education is at its best when the initiative is taken by the student himself/ herself to learn. Here the student takes responsibility and personal interest; hence education becomes much more meaningful and interesting. I can vouch for the fact that the many discoveries I made are still very vividly fresh in my mind. These discoveries have a great significance in my life because I was personally involved in them. In the same way I think that when there is personal involvement and effort there is greater production.

According to the American philosopher John Dewey, education should help students develop effective problem solving methods and skills for social interaction. Education must place its focus on the process rather on the content. The best thing that can happen is students finding truths for themselves. He believed that after a certain amount of time human beings could solve social problems using their experience and intelligence and through inquiry.

            In reality it is difficult to comprehend the power and force that education has and can produce. Education is not only about reading and writing or being able to grasp concepts and simplify them. Nor is it about the way we live in society or about mannerisms. Education is that which transforms a boy into a man or a girl into a woman. It transforms our whole attitude to our own selves as well as towards others. It helps us to come out of our narrow thinking, ego based judgments and selfishness and be more open minded, slow to judge and selfless.

William Butler Yeats rightly says “Education is not the filling of a pail, but the lighting of a fire.” I wholeheartedly agree with what he says. Sometimes it so happens that we think education is like gold which has to be filled by us in our own individual buckets. This is absolutely wrong. Quite the contrary William speaking in line with Sydney. J. Harris says that the main purpose of education is to light a fire in the heart of a student so that s/he may spread the fire to others. The focus of education is to make us other centered beings. However if this doesn’t happen the whole purpose and meaning of education is lost.

            I admire the quote of Sydney. J. Harris ‘The whole purpose of education is to turn mirrors into windows.’ I personally feel that what he said is quite apt for our current times. Firstly, education today seems to be like a rat race where all students are pacing at the speed of light to get the highest possible grade or percentage. Secondly, it seems to me that those who claim or in reality have ample amount of degrees attached to their name are the ones who are more educated. Hence, the final aim of education here seems to be to get more honour, prestige and of course money. Such an approach to education according to me can be termed as ‘degree education’ where the only aim is to accumulate degrees. Quite the contrary is the aim of education. Education prepares us for membership in the society. I particularly like the link between the two words namely education and society. The context or the background here is very significant. Education here makes sense or has more meaning because it teaches us how to relate with others.

            At the end of it all, I get a feeling that the poor man is a couple of times more educated than the ones who are actually educated. I say this because I imagine a poor man offering his seat to resolve the conflict between two educated businessmen quarreling over the issue of who should sit or whose seat it is. Education according to me should help us to live in harmony and peaceful co-existence and not fuel the fire of our ego.

            Education makes sense when the other is taken into consideration. This is what I feel Mr. Sydney wishes to convey by the use of the word ‘window’. However before this takes place, one needs to know oneself and actualize one’s potential so that reaching out to others becomes easy. For this, the mirror is necessary. What Mr. Sydney says is that we shouldn’t get caught up with the mirror i.e. with ourselves. The end product of education should make us other- centered rather than self- centered according to Mr. Sydney. Reaching out becomes possible only when one has reached within and this is possible only by having the mirror before oneself.

            Both the mirror and the window are essential in the process of education. The mirror helps us to look at ourselves and accept reality, while the window enables us to look at the world outside, people and many other things. Mr. Sydney lays emphasis on the shift from looking at ourselves to looking at others and relating with them. Just as a candle is lit not for itself but to light up the path for others, so also education is at its best when it is done with aim of enlightening the lives of others.

                        

Intellectual Life

INTRODUCTION 

            Love is the beginning of everything in us.  We do what we love and more obviously love what we do.  When given a chance of having biryani, I will surely go for it than having the daily dal and rice. The human mind is so complex and yet so simple.  It does the complex tasks if remembering so many things that come as information.  It also does some simple things like recalling facts already stored in the brain.

            The brains that we have been gifted by God are like the C. P. U of the computer.  The brain gives a command and the body responds in a like-wise manner.  Humans possess a right brain and a left brain.  The left brain controls the right side of the body while the right brain controls the left side of the body. There are thousands of chemical reactions continuously going on in our body and more so in our brains.

            Knowledge comes to our mind mainly through our senses. We have images of what we see, hear and so on in our minds. Knowledge is just a remembrance of what already exists in the mind.

            The intellectual life is one of discipline and continuous striving. It is a continuous thirst for knowledge. From the cradle to the grave we keep on learning. Learning is a never ending process. The more knowledge you get the more you feel like gaining more of it through reading, watching a movie, listening to a clipping and so on.

            The intellectual life also calls for moral responsibility towards others. The knowledge that is gained is to be shared with others so that it helps the other. Let’s journey through this amazing field of the intellectual life.

PRAYER

            Have we trials and temptations, is there trouble anywhere……   Take it to the Lord in prayer. This hymn teaches us that we can convert every moment, experience, and upcoming event and so on into prayer. As faithful Christians and disciples of Jesus (or faithful disciples of the God you believe in) we ought to begin every event with prayer. Through prayer we invite and also at the same time allow God to take care of everything; in short we place or better still, we surrender everything in His tender and loving hands.

            Prayer is raising one’s mind to God from time to time. It is not as easy as it seems to be especially in the intellectual life. It becomes very difficult to raise one’s mind to God to pray when going gets tough. It is very important for the intellectual to pray as it helps him to place everything in His hands.

            It is said that when the going gets tough the tough get going. Only being tough is not enough, putting one’s whole effort and leaving the rest to God is also equally important. Faith in God that is prayer and work are like two sides of a coin or like the two wings of a bird. In prayer the intellectual offers himself to the Lord so that He may take care of him.

VOCATIONAL INTELLECT

            Vocation to anything, anyone or any way of life comes from heaven. It is God given and not manmade. When life is taken as a vocation then one finds joy in living it on a daily basis. Everyday seems to be a brand new day and every moment seems like God’s gift. On the other hand when something is not taken as a vocation then it becomes like a job or a burden. The following words are often on the lips of a person who doesn’t treat something like a vocation; “That’s not my job, I’ve done what I was supposed to do…….”

            The intellectual life requires one to take this way of life as avocation and not as a job or a career where one finally lands up in a rat race. A mother doesn’t need to be explained as to how she should take care of her child. Taking care of her child is her vocation! She uses creative ways to take care of the child and so on. In the same the intellectual person who has taken up this vocation finds creative and refined methods of boosting his intellect.

            Also when the intellectual life is taken as a vocation one realizes that one has become so engrossed and merged into it that days have turned into months and months into years. This is the magic of treating something like a vocation.

DISCIPLINE

            Where there is a will, there is a way. And from the way comes the destination. In the same way where there is a brain, there must be a plan, and from the plan shall come the time-table. The time-table will come because there is discipline. Like any other field, the intellectual life requires discipline so that the functioning may be better.

            It is easy to expect discipline from others but very difficulties to practice it oneself. Being disciplined involves being punctual, brisk in one’s movements, temperance in eating, so on and so forth. To be a good teacher on must first be a good student. Amazingly there is a DISCIPLE in the word DISCIPL (IN) E.

            The intellectual must clearly know his aims and motives for doing something. Discipline requires effectivity and maturity. There could be many temptations which could make the intellectual lazy, frustrated, fail and so on. This is precisely the time when prayer becomes an effective tool.

            Some practical tips to become a disciplined person are as follows: Starting with small targets, resolutions and others things will help. Rewarding oneself with some relaxation and music when the target is achieved so as to encourage oneself. Affirming oneself with words such as ‘I CAN DO IT’ could prove to be helpful.

            In all this one needs to continuously keep a check on oneself so as to keep progressing.

           

YOGA

            The most important thing is will. You can take the horse to the water but cannot make it drink the water. Most of the battles or trials in life are won or lost in the mind. Yoga is something that joins or unites.

            Yoga is like a tool for the intellectual to calm down his mind. The intellectual doesn’t entail continuous filling of the mind with knowledge. The breathing and physical exercises of yoga, when done with precision, amount to the relaxation of the muscles and the brains. Meditation too is of good use to intellectual. Meditating on the gentle flow of the river or even its stillness helps the mind to become still and gentle like the river.

GAMES

            Hey! How are you feeling? Are you feeling tired, bored, and lonely…..  These questions are important to the intellectual because he is a human being and not a robot. All you who think that you are intellectuals need to become aware of your humanness.

            It is rightly said that all study and no play makes Jack a dull boy. Very true, just as study is like an exercise to the mind, so are games to the body. In life we remember what we do more than what we say, in the same way games could be used as tool to learn or to help others learn something. When the mind is tired or bored it tends to lead the body into relaxation or demands a change of activity as it can no longer concentrate.

            One shouldn’t ignore the needs of one’s body while also being careful at the same time, not to indulge in too much recreation. The recreation I’m hinting at is surely not of the intellectual type for example playing chess and the like games. Through the game the mind should be made to relax so that when one comes back to book one is refreshed and ready to begin afresh.

            What happens on the field shouldn’t however be carried to your study room. The matters of the ground should remain on the ground, if one feels that games would cause mental unrest then one could substitute it with a walk or something else that helps one to refresh oneself.

INTELLECTUAL REST

            Work and rest are like hands and legs for the body. When one at work one should give ones 100% so that the resting may be peaceful, knows that one has given ones best. Doctors recommend 7-8 hours of sleep every day.  This is important and if it is taken care of then there is full productivity when one applies oneself to work.

            In an hour of intense study there should be at least 7 to 8 minutes of relaxation. Drinking water and splashing water on the face helps in getting refreshed. When I feel tired or bored I rest by singing songs in my mind or by drawing some cartoons so as to get refreshed.

            St .John Bosco had taken a resolution to rest not more than 5 hours every night and to stay up one night in a week to do reading and to study books. He died very early due to physical exhaustion. He himself says that this is not recommended. This is a practical example of what happens when a human being over- works and exerts his body. The other extreme of this that is laxity and laziness is also very bad. Procrastination and sloth sets in, there is no purposelessness in doing tasks.

            In life everything should be done in due proportion, when one tries to experiment with extreme ways one tends to face some problem or the other as an effect. ‘Do your best and God will do the rest’. The word rest here has a different connotation but it calls the intellectual to give ones best and leave the rest in God’s hands. Sometimes rest could also mean silence. Silence is the content of the words that count much in life.

ENVIRONMENT

            The environment or the situatedness of the person in a particular place is also of grave importance in his intellectual life. The nature, trees, birds, weather and many more factors affect the way an individual works and thinks.

            Neighbors, family and friends are an integral part in an intellectual’s life. The way the neighborhood functions is the way the brains of the intellectual functions. This doesn’t always have to be so. Jesus in the Bible says that it is not what goes inside a person that defiles the person but what comes out. The exterior or the surrounding may be suitable or be a hindrance to ones intellectual life. Some people get used to all the disturbances of the surroundings while some don’t.

            The important fact to be realized sooner or later is that there are disturbances both within and without; the family plays a major role in helping to get rid of many problems. By sharing our experiences and problems with our family members (especially the ones who understand us we can resolve matters to a large extent.)

            It is of grave importance to feel comfortable and be able to relax in the company of one’s friends. Friends lighten our anguish and are like honey on the wound. When an intellectual’s stressed out or bored he should push himself to go out with his family or his friends

FAILURE

Try and try but don’t cry. Don’t ask God ‘Why me…?’ There are thousands of stories of people who have failed and yet have passed. There has to be evil if there is good, for if there was no evil there wouldn’t be good and vice versa.

‘Failure is a stepping stone to success’ and sayings of the like manner help us to encourage ourselves to give a second try. In the intellectual life there will always be difficulties, struggles, anxieties and most of all failures. The word ‘Failure’ in itself is a great teacher, the way one looks at it depends how much one is going to learn from it.

Coping with failure is difficult but not impossible. Firstly one has to accept that one has failed for which responsibility has to be taken. After this if one is mature enough and is able to look at his own failure one should go to its roots. After having excavated the cause, one must begin the process of boosting one’s self esteem so as to do better the next time.

            The next time one must really give his best and prove that ‘Failure is a stepping stone to success’. A very good example of taking failure optimistically is Thomas Alva Edison. He said that he knew 999 ways of how not to create or make a bulb. Right view and attitude towards life helps in solving many puzzles of life.

CONCLUSION

            The journey through these writings about the Intellectual life seems to be quite quick, however it is not so in reality. In our daily life, applying all the principles as presented in the chapters is a lifelong process and a struggle.

            From my own experience and from that what I have heard from others, I feel that entering the intellectual life without self-discipline will be like committing suicide. The intellectual life demands many qualities which finally make a person a gentleman. The intellect of a person is gauged with the marks one scores in the exams or by the number of degrees on holds.

I personally am totally against this type of system. All have different types and levels of intellect. One has developed a liking for History which doesn’t have to be so for a second. In being reasonable St. John Bosco says that educators must ask children to do things which they are capable of and not force unnecessary impossible demands on them.

All of us are on this beautiful journey of the Intellectual Life and different levels. The prime thing to be kept in mind that we have to continuously challenge ourselves to be and do better. The only best competitor we have to be better, than is our own selves. Competing with others is of no use, it will only seem to boost your ego while the other is dejected. Remember ‘The only competitor you have is you’ 

Marriage

The Sacrament of Matrimony is one that unites two people into one perfect communion. In a marriage, 3 persons are involved namely: the bridegroom, God and the bride. God has to be a part of the marriage. If God is not the centre of a marriage then that marriage is soon about to sink. Marriage is a bond which joins two people together and this bond is meant to last for eternity.

                One may ask as to how this whole process of marriage begins or an even a basic question like how does one know that one has made the right choice of a partner. In a recent French religious movie that I had the privilege to view, the priest said to the girl,” You will know you’re in love when something indescribable happens physically and emotionally in you, when you’re in the presence of the other.” However it must be clear that love is not only a feeling but also a feeling.

                St. Paul gives an elaborate explanation when it comes to love. He says that love is patient and kind. Love bears all things and hopes in all things. Love doesn’t rejoice over evil doings…. and so on. If I were to add my own understanding about love, I would say that love is that spice of life without which nothing seems to be delicious.

                Going back to the topic, it can be said that perfect marriages are made in heaven.  And one can make heaven even right here on earth.  It’s just a matter of being kind, gentle and loving. After marriage one must take one day at a time with the Lord and one’s spouse. Sometimes love already exists between the partners before marriage and in some cases it has to be developed.

                Marriage is a bed of both roses and thorns, sometimes there is joy and happiness and at other times sorrow and distress. The matter of concern to you is God and your spouse. Turn to God at all times and He will give you His blessings. Your marriage may seem to be all worked up but you have to work it out.

Happy married life!!